


Hardest of Hearts

by Mothbats



Category: Metal Gear
Genre: M/M, don't open weird handjob inside, early Foxhound
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-20
Updated: 2019-03-20
Packaged: 2019-11-26 14:27:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18181793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mothbats/pseuds/Mothbats
Summary: There is love in your body but you can't hold it in,It pours from your eyes and spills from your skin.Tenderest touch leaves the darkest of marks,And the kindest of kisses break the hardest of hearts.





	Hardest of Hearts

**Author's Note:**

> Old work come in from tumblr.
> 
> Based on an artwork by hamfootsia on tumblr, which may or may not still be around due to tumblr's no-porn purge. :/
> 
> Another song in the title n summary because I am Unoriginal - Hardest of Hearts by Florence + the Machine.

Mantis had been off for a while now. Not that anyone could really tell the difference except Liquid, watching the man he had known for years be, somehow, even more bitterly irritated with the world around him until not even messing with the new recruits helped alleviate his grievances. As much as Eli wished he could understand what the matter was, the fact was that he and Mantis had struggled to achieve any semblance of the intense closeness that they had shared in their days before Foxhound – not since his initial leaving to join the military had they shared such a tight mindspace as to know exactly what the other was thinking, the spindly man only allowing a fraction of who he used to be shine through when they were together. Which itself only served to create more friction as Liquid longed to fathom what, exactly, had made him act like someone had put a bee in his bonnet.

Across the cramped, far too warm office space Mantis let out a particularly frustrated growl from behind his mask, turning so that he could see his commander from the corner of his eye as Liquid scribbled a haphazard signature across a form with far too complicated a name made of numbers, shirt peeled off and laid over the back of his seat. Eli allowed a lot less formality between them in private, had noticed Mantis doing the same whether he consciously realized it or not. Like now, listening to Liquid’s thoughts without even asking; he’d gotten much better at subtlety since their parting, no longer an open two-way link of minds, but Mantis still proved to be an unrepentant snoop. At least Liquid could always get him to crack by using an increasingly awful array of insect-related puns and turns of phrase.

“There is nothing wrong with me, Boss,” Mantis’ voice slithered out from his air filters, rasping and accompanied by a squeak of leather as the psychic contorted himself further in the air. Not exactly doing any work today, he’d continued to turn his aggravated focus outward looking for a fight. Liquid could give that to him, certainly.

“Come off it already. Even people who don’t know you half as well as I do know you’re being especially touchy lately.” Eli put down his pen with far more care than usual, knowing his demeanor only served to irk Mantis further; from a feral child to a collected leader, while Mantis struggled to make it this far without going entirely insane. “If you just admit what the issue is we can all move on. I thought you and I had moved past the silent treatment when we were thirteen?” He laid his hands on his desk as Mantis continued to bristle, muttering something profane that was not entirely lost on Liquid.

The small office they were confined to for this assignment didn’t exactly help matters, barely big enough for the both of them to work comfortably even when Mantis wasn’t inexplicably pissed, watching the other man like his namesake insect, ready to strike and disembowel for any transgression. Of which there were probably several in the last hour alone, given Mantis’ attitude.

“It’s nothing you can help with. Nothing I want your help with, either.” Mantis crossed his arms, as petulant as a child when confronted about these things. No big change there, he seemed to so rarely trust Liquid with the deeper affairs of his mind after they’d been apart for years. There was still something of a learning curve as they had come back together, remembering the way they used to be and trying to rebuild on a crumbled foundation. Liquid did want to help, even if only for the sake of Foxhound as a whole, though he would prefer to find some level ground again as friends. It was his own fault for being the one to leave, but he had hoped Mantis would have given up that bitterness by now; he really had underestimated his ability to hold a grudge.

“You know I’m not fond of pulling the commander card, but if you keep spooking the recruits and being a general ass, I’m going to.” Liquid threatened, but it was hardly a threat to a man who could do whatever he wanted with only a thought, his only leash his inexplicable need to gravitate toward Liquid’s side like he belonged nowhere else. He could sense the pressure in his head as Mantis’ eyes narrowed, making his feelings towards that plain even if he didn’t speak them. Eli rubbed the bridge of his nose for a moment, the action far from helpful against the irritation, trying to keep a level head instead of playing into the other’s hand. “Seriously, Tretij, if there’s something you need to talk about-“

“Don’t call me that.” Mantis hissed like a snake on the verge of striking, the clatter of furniture in the room from loose psychic energy proving just how little control Mantis had over his emotions right now. Not the best state of mind for a powerful empath to be in. “I already told you, it’s nothing you can help me with.” He reiterated, a deep, rattling breath through his frame as Liquid furrowed his brows just slightly.

“Try me. You think I’ve forgotten about your problems, or the way you used to handle them?” Or not handle them, rather, until tiny Tretij Rebenok made himself sick with them. That had been a major headache for them both then, and was proving to be the same now. The silence was a good indication that Mantis was at least considering his offer, no expression visible but the blond able to read his body language like it was another tongue these days. “I know I haven’t been the best friend to you before, so at least allow me to try and make up for it now.” His tone was softer than he ever allowed in front of anyone else, the gentleness stronger than an actual blow to Mantis’ shell as he recoiled a bit, almost guiltily.

“…It really is all your fault,” Mantis started, arms wrapped about himself as he spoke, fingers digging in to what little flesh there was like a nervous habit. “Having to hear you, all the time, I wish I didn’t need your voice in my head to feel like I still…” He bit off that thought, shaking his head a bit as if he could dispel it. His grip on his outward projection of arrogance was starting to fade, something more like the nervous young boy Eli had grown up with showing beneath. “I can hear what you want, every time you look at me when we’re alone. Wanting to touch me and pretend like nothing ever changed between us…” Mantis’ teeth clicked shut, willing himself calm but Liquid could tell he was anything but, starting to feel ill himself as the other man’s melancholy clawed into his head.

“You’re the one who left _me_ , Eli, and I don’t even know what you want anymore. Do you think if I was still a scared child you could soothe me with your confidence and win me over again? Or if we have sex you can make me remember how good it felt to be connected so deeply that I’ll do anything for it?” The vitriol that dripped from his words was barely able to mask the pain behind them, Liquid subconsciously reaching out only to be rebuffed as Mantis floated further from his grip. “No, you don’t _get_ to be sorry! You being sorry doesn’t fix anything, it won’t fix _me!_ ” Behind him Liquid could hear the crack of glass in its frame, some picture or map that threatened to fall apart.

Eli could only let Mantis breathe through his upset, not daring to interrupt until he was sure the psychic was finished. It was hard enough holding his own composure through it instead of letting his mind submit to Mantis’ emotions as they pressed him in such a familiar way. Now they existed in such tension that either moving felt like it would be violating this trust to speak so openly about their thoughts, Liquid the first to give as he stood from his desk. There was a brief flare of alarm fluttering against his thoughts as Mantis recoiled, as if afraid of being struck, the blond able to see the quick rise and fall of the empath’s uneasy breathing. Liquid came to stand beside his desk but not close enough to make Mantis feel boxed in, both watching the other carefully as if evaluating a wild animal.

“I thought I already told you, I’m not looking for forgiveness, Tretij.” Liquid spoke and his voice was carefully controlled, years of training it to be certain even when he himself wasn’t. He couldn’t be sure that Mantis bought into it at all, frozen in the air and still aside from his hoarse breathing. It was nothing new to be said, a discussion long past now, Eli having understood that there was no penance for the harm he had done to his only friend upon abandoning him. “I’m not looking for forgiveness, and I’m not looking to fix you either. I do want to help you in any way that I can now; I know you need more emotional support than you get, blocking yourself from any assistance.” Liquid paused, hazarding a step forward. Mantis didn’t move away, eyes unreadable behind the orange lenses of his mask.

“You can trust me as your commander if you don’t want to trust me as your friend. I’d rather it be the latter, but if I have to force your hand for the good of the team instead of our relationship, then I will.” The seriousness of Liquid’s words was what pierced Mantis’ shields, the empath coming to rest his toes on the floor, a puppet with strings fallen slack. Liquid could recognize the tired look anywhere, the defeat in his stature and the exhaustion of putting up a front, mentally, physically. He didn’t even pull away when Eli came to rest his hand along Mantis’ forearm, a spark of connection in the touch translating what Liquid already knew. “Tell me what you need, Mantis.”

“I…” Mantis began, stopped, not sure what he wanted to ask, perhaps not fully sure what he needed. He had been upset with Liquid and wanted to unload his frustrations with his thoughts, but that had only been part of it, craving stability and wanting Eli to actually look at him, instead of through him at the things he used to be, at the things they had together a lifetime ago. Even having an opportunity now to rekindle that feeling, he couldn’t be certain if that was what he really wanted; all he knew is that he ached to have some form of grounding, a connection that he chose instead of one that wormed its way into his mind and impressed itself until Mantis couldn’t escape it. Eli had always been many things to him, but never that.

“Come here,” Liquid beckoned without waiting for more, pulling Mantis forward and feeling him alight off the ground just barely, easier to direct with his meager weight negated. The psychic didn’t refuse but still moved sluggishly as if he might change his mind, bracing himself on Liquid’s shoulders to enforce a distance. Of course the man had neglected to put on a shirt even now, a thin sheen of sweat making his skin slick under Mantis’ bared fingers; he didn’t feel the summer heat the same way Liquid did, hardly any fat or muscle to keep the warmth under his leather clothes. Eli was looking him over carefully, hands sliding from the taller of the pair’s arms to his mask, Mantis twisting his head away with a heavy _“don’t”_ that stilled those searching fingers.

“All right,” Liquid soothed, no longer focused on the straps but dragging his blunt nails lightly over the other’s scalp, finding the places smoothed by a recent shave and others where bright hair still threatened to grow prickly under the pads of his fingers, the rough lines of crude surgical scars the worst. Mantis allowed and shivered at the intimacy of it, perhaps more intimate than a kiss, allowing Liquid to take his time touching him, tracing along the line of the mask to his jaw and down his neck, finding the lines of old burns that had faded pale like the rest of him. It wasn’t until Liquid reached the zipper that lay at the hollow of Mantis’ throat that they both paused, a long, shuddering sigh behind the gas mask.

“All right,” Mantis whispered in echo of Liquid’s words, voice quiet and gravelly as the other man pressed his hands to the leather on Mantis’ chest, over his heart and feeling the warmth radiating out. He wouldn’t question him if it was what he wanted, knowing Mantis would refuse if he overstepped his bounds. The zipper slid apart with ease, sounding strangely loud in the otherwise silent room as Liquid parted the sides just enough to slip his hand down the empath’s torso, able to count every rib as Mantis shuddered and held a bit tighter to him. It only encouraged more and more, Eli taking the zip to its end destination to the point right above Mantis’ crotch, the expanse of skin revealed even more starkly white against the dark of the leather, only a very small bit of patchy red peeking out above the bottom of the zipper’s open v.

Mantis didn’t resist Liquid guiding him, the blond walking the few steps backwards until he came to sit on his own desk, carelessly pushing aside papers as he moved back far enough to offset his weight against pulling Mantis into his lap, settling him in the spot just above his knees. It was close enough to be able to touch but also enough distance to be able to get a good look at everything he was doing, Mantis’ slumped posture allowing the opening in his clothes to gap open further. As tantalizing as the sight was to Eli who couldn’t recall the last time he had seen Mantis in such a state, he held back, waiting for some sign that taking it this far was really all right as he had said.

There was a brief lull as Mantis considered Liquid’s thoughts as they coursed through his mind, head tilting slightly as he brought his palms back to rest on the other man’s broad chest. He could tell his end goal, although it had been transparent from the start; Mantis hadn’t been opposed to it once Liquid had assuaged his anger, offered up what he could in the now instead of apologies for the past. Sex for Mantis had always been about the emotional connection, the pleasure of sharing one mind so thoroughly that he almost felt out of his own body when they were in sync together, better than any orgasm achieved through the filthy press of flesh. Back then Eli had enjoyed the physicality of the act more but now he had matured enough to indulge in something that was not exclusively for himself, willing to get Mantis off and derive pleasure from that instead.

“It would be better if I could kiss you,” Liquid grinned wryly as he pressed into the concave spot below the curve of Mantis’ ribs, the other holding the psychic’s leg to ensure he stayed balanced as he arched to fit his lanky body comfortably around both Eli and the desk they were on. Mantis wouldn’t dignify that with an answer, not much in the mood to be teased and struggling enough to keep his composure against the way Liquid’s calloused skin crept along his belly. There wasn’t much to be bothered with, no muscle definition to speak of but plenty of scars spiderwebbing back and forth over one another, enough that Liquid could trace them like rivers down and down.

The bite of the zipper’s teeth in the back of his hand was hardly noticeable as his fingers closed over what he had been aiming for, still soft as Liquid tested what he could remember his partner had once preferred. Gingerly squeezing brought about a strained sigh, and rubbing his thumb in circles over the head of him made Mantis bow until the filter of his mask was laying across Liquid’s shoulder, every twitch through his frame immediately noticeable and played upon for a better reaction. He didn’t have to give verbal feedback, touching skin to skin amplifying their senses in more ways than one until Liquid could feel the other man’s emotions and snippets of thoughts breaking through and making themselves known, stirring him into further action. Even as he seemed to be enjoying himself Mantis growled and grit his teeth, breathing heavily as if pained.

“Something the matter?” Liquid asked and his own voice sounded a lot huskier than he anticipated, noting a shudder that wound its way down Mantis’ prominent spine as it was nearly spoken right in his ear. The thin fingers against his chest flexed briefly, Mantis snapping that he was fine in a clipped tone that cracked as it left his mouth and Liquid increased pressure and speed. He simply seemed awful testy for someone receiving a handjob and as long as it had been since their last, Eli was sure he wasn’t so rusty that his recipient should be this riled.

“I hate that I enjoy this at all, that I thought I wanted it…” Mantis cursed under his breath but still didn’t disengage, shaking his head minutely. Liquid knew better than to ask if he wanted to stop, the sharp press of sinewy thighs into his waist speaking for itself. Mantis did always seem so contrary, a disconnect between body and mind. “The human body is so filthy and needy, is there really is no other way to alleviate but to acknowledge?” He couldn’t do much against the groan that spilled from his mouth when Liquid squeezed hard, Mantis hot and heavy in his hand, sweat building under his heavy attire but making it no easier to stroke as the leather stuck to his skin. “This is disgusting.”

“Isn’t it just?” Liquid retorted, smirk growing as Mantis rolled his shoulders and the side of his throat became visible as if offered up, the blond almost able to see the quickened pulse under that thin skin. The humor in his face faded as he caught sight of Mantis’ eyes screwed shut behind the lenses of his mask, long lashes fanned over his cheeks. “I’m doing this because I wanted to make you feel good, show you that I’m trying to connect with you like we used to, but if you don’t want it-“

“Shut up,” Mantis barked, clenching tight over Liquid’s shoulders as he started teetering toward that precipice. There was no way Liquid didn’t feel it drilling into his own head too; it was nothing like what they used to have, only a spark of the old way catching now that Mantis was relaxing, working his mind around the disgust for a redeeming quality. There was a flare of irritation from his partner, Eli remembering the old days when he would have growled right back for that, now quiet if tense and waiting to hear more. “Just… keep going then, if you want it, if it _helps_ …” Mantis bit his tongue before some obscene noise could escape, warmed by the press of Eli’s mind and hands pulling him in different directions at once.

“If _you_ want it, Tretij,” Liquid corrected, leaning further into the space opened along Mantis’ shoulder and this time not castigated for using that name, the scent of sweat and leather thick in his nose, making his head swim a little more as he gained his own trills of gratification from his ministrations. Despite his nature making him bare his teeth like a dog whose master had wronged him, Mantis was opening up now in more ways than one. It was the only way Eli knew how well he was doing and just how much the other man was coming undone, mounting pleasure and gasping in his ear through the plastic, not sure if he was imagining his name in those wheezing breaths as Mantis spilled into his hand without further talk. The irate front had totally melted away to enjoying the last remaining shivers of pleasure, Liquid finding the look almost… cute.

“Do you have to be so transparent?” Mantis sighed, having moved further forward to rest and catch his breath, the cool rim of his mask filter coming to lie fully on Liquid’s heated skin. “Even if I couldn’t read your mind it’s obvious you’re getting… _sentimental_ …” The way he said it Liquid could tell what was left of his nose must have been scrunched in distaste for the concept, choking on his words when Liquid squeezed him one last time for good measure before extricating his hand from between Mantis’ legs.

“Say what you will, but it almost seemed like you were enjoying yourself toward the end.” Liquid reached for the handkerchief he had kept nearby to wipe his brow while he worked, now using it to clean his hand as best he could while Mantis remained amazingly tranquil in his lap. It would be worth it having to stay late to finish his paperwork, reveling in this post-coital high he had mentally leeched from Mantis, knowing that just being able to feel it meant Mantis was no longer forcefully pushing him out of his head. Even though he scoffed and pretended otherwise, Mantis was obviously feeling at least marginally better as he allowed himself to stay coiled against someone else for the first time in a long while.

“Enjoyment aside, try not to let this go to your head.” Mantis sniffed, drumming his fingers along Liquid’s collarbone as he mulled over his thoughts on everything that had just transpired. He hadn’t hated it, and having Liquid take care of him, soothing his mind and physically touching… he forgot that despite the messy nature of it, it could feel nice, had been a good distraction although now the disgust was returning. Liquid huffed in amusement, the breath brushing over Mantis’ sensitive ear and making him stiffen and jerk away, a hand at his back keeping him steady instead of totteringly floating off or falling. Eli looked him over as if admiring his handiwork in the most frustratingly haughty way imaginable before zipping Mantis back up, the action slow and meaningful, akin to taking care of something dearly beloved. Mantis rolled his eyes.

“Having you back in there, I’m sure you’ll put a stop to it if you sense I’m getting too much for you to handle.” Liquid helped Mantis slide from his lap, floating almost sleepily and passive, a quiet rumble in the back of Liquid’s head to confirm. The familiarity of it was relieving, like finding something he hadn’t known he’d missed. Mantis’ expression wasn’t readable behind his mask, but he seemed, from all of Eli’s other senses, to be pleased with the turnout, bemusement in his tone as he turned back to his own work.

“Whatever you say, Boss.”


End file.
